Impact
Site Admin Joined: 01 May 2004 Posts: 3258 Location: Pinecrest, FL	Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2004 12:58 pm    Post subject: PC Game Review :: 3d Striptease Demo   Producer: 3Dstriptease team Full Game Release Date: N/A Introduction: Wow. If you were expecting something redeemable about this game, look elsewhere. The game is insulting on so many levels. It takes a first person shooter (FPS), combines it with a striptease, and somehow comes out making me want to cry. Computer Specs (Impact): Processor: AMD XP2100+ cooled by a Koolance Water-Cooling System Memory: 512M DDR PC3200 Motherboard: ABIT NF7-S with onboard 10/100 LAN Sound Card: Creative Labs Sound Blaster 5.1 Live! Power Supply: Antec 350 Watts "SL350" Primary Monitor: Generic 17" CRT Speakers: Altec Lansing 5.1 Video Card: 64mb Geforce4 TI4200 Hard Drive 1: Western Digital 80gb (8mb Cache) Hard Drive 2/3: 2x Western Digital 80gb (8mb Cache) Striped in RAID-0 DVD-RW: Sony 8x CD-RW: 52x24x52x Operating System: Windows XP Professional w/SP1 Main Thoughts: This should be quick, but fairly painful. Hopefully the full game adds a LOT to the content, because at this rate, I don't see anyone buying this game. When I first started up the demo, I almost laughed. The menu is bad, but I got excited when I saw the list of controls. Everything in a normal FPS is in the controls: Shoot, Reload, Strafes, Jump, Crouch, you name it, its there. Surprisingly, in the game, you barely use any of them. The point of the game is to shoot hearts that float down from the ceiling with your firecracker to get money. You can also shoot little yellow bubbles for double the money. If your money runs out, the lady dancing on stage leaves. If you can manage to shoot the little things as they fall, and keep your money above zero until the time runs out, the dancer takes off a piece of clothing. If you run out of money, the game is over. They did try to make the game somewhat harder by adding flying drinks. If you get hit by the attacking martini you lose a bit of money, making if harder to get the dancer to strip. Unfortunatly, even on the hardest setting the game is quite easy. Anyone with a basic abilty in Counter Strike or any other FPS will easily make it through the demo in a few minutes. What I found quite sad was, while there are only two human models in the game (your character and the dancer) the developers decided to only skin one. If you walk to the back of the stage, and run out of money, you can see your character is just a pitch black blob. The level consists of about 3 tables, a strip for the dancer, and two hallways. One to the back of the stage, one to an exit door leading nowhere. [page] Screenshots: Quote: 100 'money' for shooting the floating yellow bubbles. I say 'money' because what type (dollars, pennies, nickles) is never addressed. It is just 'money'. Quote: 50 'money' for shooting the floating red hearts. Quote: An evil martini glass is about to steal some of my money... Oh no. In the bottom left you can see the two meters. Green indicates money, if this drops to 0, you lose. The red is the timer. Keep your money above 0 until the timer runs out to get the dancer to strip. Quote: Just another shot of the game. Exactly, 3 pictures and you've seen the whole thing. Quote: Another pic, to be more complete. Conclusion: I honestly can't fathom why anyone would want to buy this game. If you had a basic understanding that typing 'computer generated porn' will probably produce better results in google, you wouldn't waste your time. I'm pretty sure I made a better game back in junior year of high school, and I never finished mine. Rating on a scale of 1 (absolutely awful) to 10 (jaw-dropping) Gameplay: 1/10 - It's a crappy version of a FPS, mixed with a crappy porn site. Graphics 1/10 - They didn't even bother to skin one of the two human models in the game. Sound 3/10 - I sort of enjoyed the song playing the background, I have to admit it. Replay Value 1/10 - I never want to have to play this game again, unless to find out the name of that song... Overall 1.5/10 - Please don't waste your time. Links: You can find the demo for download at www.fileplanet.com. All pictures are the property of their respective owners, in this case: 3d Striptease Team.
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